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One of my favorite summers I think I’ve had took place when we were living in Chicago. It was always fun to hit up a Cubs game. Of course, this was still when they were good, and didn’t totally suck. (What’s up with that, anyway?) We’d hit up Wrigleyville early, grab a brat somewhere, have a beer in a local pub just before the game. That is, if you could actually get in. It was fun walking by the scalpers offering small fortunes for one mere ticket, yours tucked away safely in your pocket. It was your ticket to a guaranteed blast of an afternoon filled with beer, shouting, cheering, booing, and an energy that could only be had at Wrigley Park. The games were always so intense that summer - the crowd got so loud sometimes you couldn’t hear yourself think. You couldn’t help but smile, because every single person was there for the same reason you were. There was a comradery there, that made the event so special. Thousands of people gathered on one Sunday afternoon to see their favourite local baseball team win. And win, they did.

Taken July 15, 2006
Creswell, OR

I’m trying my hand at getting some of my creativity back. When I was a kid, I used to love writing, drawing, painting, being in art class, etc. I couldn’t get enough of using that side of my brain. As an adult, however, it’s like most of that desire has gone away, and has never returned. I started getting this internal nag a few weeks back, and I didn’t realize what it was until I started looking at my photos and talking to a friend of mine. I’m lacking creativity, and my brain wants it back. I made it a point to take some photos this weekend. I think photography’s sort of my natural knack, if you will, so I want to get better at it. I’m going to try and make it a point to take my camera everywhere that I can. My friend and I are going to do some photo excursions together anywhere and everywhere in and around Portland. It should be fun, and I’m really excited to get going on this whole creative thing. It’s strange - I’m excited. Refreshed. Rejeuvenated. I’m almost surprised that this is what it is I’ve been needing, yet it seems so ridiculously obvious. I both love and hate when that happens.

I call this set “Carnival,” for obvious reasons, and because my new discovery to get creative is.. well. Really fun and exciting.

I’m really f’ing proud of myself today. REALLY f’ing proud. After two years of hovering in the 280’s range, I have finally broken my cusp. My mental block. That something in side of me that kept making me think I’d never get beyond 280. That hoochie is gone, and replaced with The Girl That Can Do Anything. I like her a lot better.

This week, I really stuck to my points. I didn’t work out much, aside from a walk Thursday during lunch for a half hour, due to being sick most of the week. I could barely breath as it was, I can’t even imagine subjecting myself to Curves all week, busting it on the weight machines. I already sounded like I’d been smoking since I was in the womb, so I didn’t want to push it. I’ve been living on Subway the last few days over lunch. I like Subway because I know what the exact points are of each item there, so there’s no guesswork. That’s been one of my biggest frustrations throughout this process: Guesswork. Most of the time you’re wrong, especially when it comes to going out to eat. You’ve no idea how the food is prepared, how much oil was used, how much butter is in that seemingly healthy meal. I’ve been trying to avoid going out to places where I can’t accurately count my points. Dotti’s Weight Loss Zone is a great site if you want a giant restaurant list that has points listed out for all sorts of meals, I’ve discovered. Great resource.

So yeah. I’m reveling in this week. I know there will be weeks where I won’t always lose three or four pounds, or even one. Those are the most discouraging, so it’d be best if I kept this moment in my mind - I got below 280, and plan to stay that way. Out of my three attempts of WW, this is a.) the most I’ve ever lost in total, b.) the lowest I’ve ever got, and c.) the easiest it’s been so far. Maybe because I’m finally ready to get serious about it. So, the numbers, my friends. Have a great weekend!

P.S. I kick ass. Thanks.

Started: June 3rd, 2006
Beginning weight: 289.5
As of July 15, 2006: 277.5
Lost this week: -3 lb
Total lost: 12 lbs

My doctor, growing up, used to call me Blue Eyes. He called my dad, ‘Ol Blue Eyes, after Sinatra. My dad and I are blessed with them. They’re probably one of my favourite physical attributes about myself.

It’s kind of nice to be able to point out something I like about myself, physically, you know it? I think we spend far too much time trying to compare ourselves to unrealistic things, that we forget the pretty things we possess. You have some, too.

What is your favourite thing about summer, and why?

I’m pretty stoked about this week. I tried to focus on really sticking with tracking my allotted points, and apparently, it paid off. I didn’t really work out much this week; I think I walked twice on my lunch hour at work.

I did make one of my all-time favourite recipes this week, that just so happens to be a WW one. Oh, good Lord. I like a lot of simple dishes that don’t require a ton of prep time or skill. If I can dump it all into a crockpot, I’m all over it. So, with that, I give you Beef Provencal:

1 pound lean beef round, cut into 1-inch cubes (London Broil)
1 sprays cooking spray
1 small onion(s), chopped
2 cup mushroom(s), sliced
2 medium garlic clove(s), minced
2 large carrot(s), sliced
15 oz canned pinto beans, drained and rinsed, divided **
1 1/2 cup canned beef broth, divided **
14 1/2 oz canned crushed tomatoes
1/2 tsp dried oregano, crushed
1/4 tsp dried thyme, crushed
1/2 tsp table salt
1/4 tsp black pepper
2 Tbsp thyme, or 2 whole sprigs, for garnish (optional)

Place beef in a 5-quart slow cooker. Coat a 12-inch nonstick skillet with cooking spray. Add onion, mushrooms and garlic. Sauté overmedium-high heat 5 minutes, stirring occasionally; add toslow cooker. Add carrots.

** (I generally don’t even bother with this step. They do it to make the soup thicker, and I haven’t found that it really works well enough to take the time to drag my blender out and complete this step every single time. I just wind up dumping it all in together.) Place half of beans in slow cooker. Place remaining beans in a blender. Add 1/2 cup of broth to blender and puree.

Add mixture to slow cooker. Add remaining broth, tomatoes, oregano, dried thyme, salt and pepper to slow cooker.

Cover and cook on high setting of slow cooker for 6 to 7 hours. Garnish with fresh thyme if desired. Yields about 2 cups per serving.

I hope you enjoy it. You’ll have to let me know how it is. The best part? Four points for a serving! Can’t beat it.

One of things I struggled with this week is feeling like I’m cheating if I grab a little sumthin’ sumthin’ I shouldn’t be. Example: My friend made this ridiculously yummy dessert-ish bread to work yesterday, and every time I walked by, I snagged a little piece. I didn’t know how to begin calculating it into my points, so I just didn’t. And because I didn’t, I started feeling guilty, which lead to feeling like I was cheating myself, and ultimately, a weak ass. It’s silly to let it get to that point, because then it ultimately ends in my seeing the scale, and God forbid I gained a little. I go into this downward spiral on myself about how I obviously can’t do this, blah blah blah, and you know what? It’s totally stupid. Life is too short not to eat a piece of desserty bread, if you want it. What I’ve learned more than anything this week would probably be that there’s moderation to everything. I got my desserty bread, and hey, I didn’t even count it. I just didn’t have five pounds of it.

Started: June 3rd, 2006
Beginning weight: 289.5
As of July 8, 2006: 280.5
Lost this week: -4 lb
Total lost: 9 lbs

Last night, I wrote about how music sucks these days. Jeremy and I got to talking, and he told me about an article in Wired that he thought I’d be interested in. I did a little digging on their site. Maybe he’s right - perhaps it isn’t the music’s fault entirely.

Thanks, J, for the interesting article!

I know I’ve mentioned this topic before, but what happened to music? I say the 60’s and the 90’s were the best, both prolific times in music’s history. The 60’s brought Pink Floyd, the Doors, and all the other good stuff I grew up on. It was a time of all kinds of turmoil, drugs, war, and hippies, and for some reason, that whole time period fascinates me. The 90’s brought Nirvana and Pearl Jam, the start of the “alternative” revolution. They brought new sound to the mainstream, and started a whole new culture of music. Old Metallica, Zeppelin, the Beatles - you couldn’t go wrong with them, because they started something, or ended it. What the hell does Nickelback do, for example, other than sound like everyone else on the radio nowadays?

I know there’s good stuff out there, and I wonder why it doesn’t get played on the radio. Matt, for example, has whipped out a few bands at me that I’d never heard, that I was really blown away by. But you’d never hear them on the radio. That’s a shame. Portland does have a decent radio station though - 94.7 FM. They tout the word “alternative” around as if it’s cool again, but I will give them the credit that they are a lot different than your normal main stream rock station. Oh, I guess I could always go out and get Sirius or XM radio, but I don’t want to have to pay money to listen to something good. I want to just be able to whip on my radio and hear something that excites me. I’ve been bored the last six years. Give a girl a break.

Down with this emo sad bastard crap. I’m over cookie monster bands, too. I want a music revolution!